May 4, 2008

kanye's baby

the stork indeed delivers… via secret messenger service. jim shi (pictured below) welcomes his newly adopted bundle, fendi’s 400 percent bearbrick luca that’s entertained and wowed many passersby at the nyc flagship.

dually announced by the chic report, kanye west is now the adoptive father of luca’s elder brother whom is le couleur pour saison, jaune.luca, jim shi's bundle of joy

these bearbricks were conceived by parents karl lagerfeld & silvia venturini fendi, and are beyond retardo. its like a life-size lego for fashion savvy adults. coveting? yes!

awaiting my stork delivery,



May 3, 2008

thought we shared something special, but my assumption is amiss as you’re seen/referenced everywhere; ie. the illustration above. i expressed my frustration with a friend, whose mind is equally equipped, about making this relationship terminal as the new kids perting about fashion use your name as thrift.

evermore, today, our affair has ended as many drop your name as means of conversed relevancy rather than understanding your genius or living the lifestyle your brand reflects. no longer will we walk hand-in-hand publicly, as the esoteric value for me erodes with this incessant throng of fashion illiterates using your name loosely in trite phrases & rap jingles “for macking hoes or flossing.”

kaiser karl, i wore your questionably strong & perhaps, smelly lagerfeld fragrance back in the early 90s at 12, so its saddening to do this & i’ll miss languishing publicly about your laudable talent but here’s why. these wannabes are copious rather than inventive as your statement is highly replicated. i see more glasses and gloves & im-purposeful monochromatic statements beyond measure. atlanta stretches the realm of wretched as locals possess no identity other than what others are doing.

marc, jacobs that is, i was a fan of your ability when the world considered you ugly… times when your hair was curly and greenwich was your home. your brilliance is undeniable, but as you gain name-dropping credibility by the intrepid hip-hop genre (think ray-j), i’m losing interest publicly though the gold trouser in vuitton men’s rtw ’08 is major must.

lastly, mr. lauren, the most influential american designer! wow, as i’m thoughtful of the time in which i was courted to sell runway/purple label for women’s collection. now, every male in “black hollywood” lists you as their go-to favorite when the masses are really fan’s of polo. there’s a difference & my immersion into all things w.a.s.p.-ish i will miss. oh it hurts; it hurts to do this but i must.

clandestinely missing you all dearly,

the kaiser as a dj

karl is hell bent on dominance in the urban setting, as the influential designer makes an appearance in the recent installment of the grand theft auto (gta) catalog. apparently game developers Rockstar heard the legend of Karl’s 70+ Ipods (and the person he employs ventures solely to various countries and uploads whatever is current at the time.)

it’s earnt him an invitation to dj for his own station on gta IV as its apparent lagerfeld will be spinning a dance and electro set.

for justification, lagerfeld rebuffs, “they are the games of our times. those games in a way changed the world…. they had written a politically incorrect dialogue… i loved it, [particularly] in a time when everybody wants to be so politically correct when they talk… i prefer to be in a video than to play with it. i would love to be a very nasty, politically incorrect character.”

karl, you are indeed a nasty (pause) character though i’m to publicly disown my love affair of your genius soon.