the mortgage lending/housing crunch has bottomed out the weakened economy so much that all consumers are reluctant to spend money except on commodities. my commissioning confidants at ferragamo & ralph lauren even feel the strain as their amex wielding clients are m.i.a. when in this bind of fickle affairs, the government sector looks for retailers to stimulate the economy so to refute talks of recession, but it’s perilously inevitable; we’re in one. very few retailers are actually netting quarterly profit (hermes 7.5% gain) and the few that are baffle me as whom openly buys this shit. (yes, i said shit!)

terrorist #1: g.u.e.s.s. by marciano.


everything about g.u.e.s.s. reads wretched, yet they are expanding aggressively according to WWD. the spent woebegone monogram g’s intended to resemble gucci’s guccissima print, the shoddy patent leathers, those cheap a** shoes to the mediocre, mass-produced, always similar-looking product should only be adorned by tweens. even worse are their editorial campaigns which uses current models to reference 80s-early 90s nostalgia when anna nicole smith was their muse. how amusing! she’s deceased & times have changed; adapt, no, die.

one can really learn much about a person based on where they shop & there’s two one-liners i share with close friends about the duplex of g.u.e.s.s.

1: g.u.e.s.s. is for whores
2: g.u.e.s.s. is white trash couture

terrorist #2: the poor man’s gucci (coach).


long gone are the days when coach meant chic. i’ll tread light since coach aims solely toward women but i am for calling a spade a spade. yep, wretched. coach is the crem de la crem of the crab bucket as they’ve dumbed themselves down to turn profit, which is shrewdly strategic in this anemic economy but there’s no exclusivity when pubescent teens pump around in head-to-toe coach in lenox.

granted, one can only afford what he/she can afford. and if these two black sheep retailers is within your price point, i empathize but remain cognizant of your purchasing decisions when shopping thrift. avoid monogram as it serves as a signal to your monetary worth, and logos which mean you’re paying them to advertise for them; that’s called pimping.

shocked but not awed,